Graphics by Carrie Clowers ’18
BY ELEANOR HARRIS ’20
Cuffing season is rapidly approaching, and MoRomance is doing our best to help. We match students based on their responses to our very scientific survey, send them on exciting blind dates and report the details back to you.
For our inaugural date, we set up Roswell*, who told us that her ideal date would be to “topple an oppressive regime together… and make out,” withRuth*, who told us the perfect date is “making out in a canoe.” MoRomance matched the two in hopes that they’d have a wonderful time — or at least make out.
We stocked Creighton’s Golden Pear with cookie-making supplies, twinkle lights and the game Battleship. We told Roswell and Ruth to meet there on Saturday night, hoping they’d be a perfect fit. Here’s what they had to say about the date:
Roswell: I’m always scoping out the scene for ladies. But I feel like as soon as I befriend someone, I’m like, “I can’t date them now [since] they’re my friend.” But I make friends here too easily, because everyone here is too nice.
Ruth: MoRomance sounded entertaining. I didn’t know what to expect — maybe dinner?
Roswell: I was early by ten minutes. I went [into the Golden Pear] briefly to see what was on the table. It was a cookie pan and cookie ingredients and Battleship. I was like, “Holy shit, Battleship! I love Battleship!”
Ruth: She got there first. I didn’t want to be super early. I remember putting in the form that I was an athlete. [I] noticed that she didn’t appear to be an athlete.
Roswell: She was also blonde. She was wearing a flannel. I felt very neutral. I thought she was kind of cute… I can’t quite explain it. The instant I see another blonde, I’m like, there can only be one blonde in the relationship!
Ruth: I thought I might have more in common with the person I was matched with… but it was not that awkward.
Roswell: We got started making the cookies right away. Pretty early on, we realized the pan didn’t fit the oven. It was really funny. We just stuck the cookies in and left the door open.
Ruth: [We had] a little bit in common: Computer science and Dungeons and Dragons.
Roswell: We played a few games of Battleship and we checked the cookies every now and then. After like three games, we were like, okay, they’re not going to work. We were considering eating them, and she was like, I don’t want to get salmonella. I ate one partially, and then I realized it was very raw.
Ruth: I asked her what she was interested in. She didn’t say very much. It wasn’t that fun, [but] wasn’t that awkward.
Roswell: We asked each other what classes we were taking. She’s on the rowing team. I mentioned toward the end that I had been on a kayak once. I was bringing up the conspiracy theory that Finland wasn’t real, and she was like, “I’ve been there. I’m pretty sure Finland’s real.” I was like, “You might be right.”
Ruth: I said I was tired and I was going to sleep. [We] just said bye and waved. [I was] glad that she didn’t say anything about seeing each other again, because then I would have to think of how to respond.
Roswell: We did not exchange numbers or anything. We’re not going to see each other again, [but] it was a fun experience to have. I’ve always wanted to go on a blind date. It was certainly interesting. Would I do it again? Yes.
Ruth: It was entertaining. [I] got a good kick out of telling people I was going on a blind date set up by the newspaper.
The interviews have been condensed and edited for clarity. To sign up for MoRomance, visit bit.ly/moromance.
*Names have been changed for anonymity.