When we look at other people, we make instant assumptions about them, from the way they dress, act or even what they are interested in. These expectations can be damaging, not only because they are often untrue, but also because they can be incredibly hard to unlearn. This is often true for those who do not fit within the gender binary, and even more so for those who do not fit into the androgynous stereotype often ascribed to non-binary people. It is one thing to understand that gender identity, pronouns and gender expression are three separate categories, and it is another to actively deconstruct the notions of gender that place those groupings together.
Children should be free to explore gender identity
Children begin understanding and categorizing gender around the age of two to three, and, as per Lawrence Kohlberg’s theory of gender identity development, they then move from understanding their own identities to the larger landscape, associating what behaviors go with what identity. Developmental psychologist Laura Zimmerman discusses how childhood experiences play a role in this gender development.